Kiss My Knits!

Urge to kill rising…

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I just got a note saying that I’m up for jury duty. That’s not so bad, but according to Mecklenburg County’s jury duty security site, ” Knives, scissors, or any other sharp objects (including knitting needles longer than 3 inches) are not allowed into the building.” As my husband pointed out, 3″ = totally harmless. 5″ = unbelievable killing machine.

I’ll never make it a day without my knitting. I’ll snap. SNAP, I TELL YOU! So watch the news for reports of a deranged woman being hauled away, screaming, “YOU’LL NEVER TAKE MY NEEDLES! KNIT FREE OR DIE!!”

Comments

22 responses to “Urge to kill rising…”

  1. naiad_kitty Avatar
    naiad_kitty

    Knitting needles longer than 3″?? Do they make needles shorter than 3″?? Maybe, um, a short circular where the needle is tiny but the circular cord holds things? Can you maybe knit on a cable needle? Or resort to pencils. Even a nice chunky scarf on pencils would be better than nothing, right? (This is crazy, it is!)

  2. naiad_kitty Avatar
    naiad_kitty

    Knitting needles longer than 3″?? Do they make needles shorter than 3″?? Maybe, um, a short circular where the needle is tiny but the circular cord holds things? Can you maybe knit on a cable needle? Or resort to pencils. Even a nice chunky scarf on pencils would be better than nothing, right? (This is crazy, it is!)

  3. jessimuhka Avatar
    jessimuhka

    When I had jury duty last winter, it said the same thing, so I took a book. Of course, the woman next to me was knitting and no one said a thing about it. I vote take the knitting, but go early enough you can make a trip back to your car if they tell you no.

  4. jessimuhka Avatar
    jessimuhka

    When I had jury duty last winter, it said the same thing, so I took a book. Of course, the woman next to me was knitting and no one said a thing about it. I vote take the knitting, but go early enough you can make a trip back to your car if they tell you no.

  5. starsongky Avatar
    starsongky

    Plastic crochet hook?

  6. starsongky Avatar
    starsongky

    Plastic crochet hook?

  7. knit_fink Avatar
    knit_fink

    The “needle” part on circs are about three inches right?

  8. knit_fink Avatar
    knit_fink

    The “needle” part on circs are about three inches right?

  9. janecpb Avatar
    janecpb

    Hey, I know you!

    I clicked on your blogspot blog and I recognized the Jayne hat entry! I used it when I was trying to make Jayne hats for Christmas of 2006. Small knitting world. 🙂

  10. janecpb Avatar
    janecpb

    Hey, I know you!

    I clicked on your blogspot blog and I recognized the Jayne hat entry! I used it when I was trying to make Jayne hats for Christmas of 2006. Small knitting world. 🙂

  11. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    Wow, small world indeed! I’m enjoying your rationing experiment. And your son is adorable in that picture!

  12. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    Wow, small world indeed! I’m enjoying your rationing experiment. And your son is adorable in that picture!

  13. tribanin Avatar
    tribanin

    Ok, some suggestions.

    1. Tell them that you can spot a guilty person ::snap!:: just like that!

    2. In the same bag/container with your knitting needles, stick a small pistol, a crossbow and a blowgun. When they give you that WTF? look, just start singing…

    One of these things is not like the others,
    One of these things just doesn’t belong,
    Can you tell which thing is not like the others
    By the time I finish my song?

    You’ll be done with Jury Duty in no time!

    3. Wear a Jane hat during the Jury Selection process. Add a button that says something like:
    “The DA is an Alliance Flunky”

    “The difference between lawyers and Reavers? One’s an insane cannibalistic subculture that feeds on the weak and the others are Reavers.*”

    *Note – This attempt at humor refers only to those of the legal profession as they exist in the fictional universe created by the mind of Joss Whedon and is in no way a reflection on the fine upstanding members of the legal community in our world today. 🙂

  14. tribanin Avatar
    tribanin

    Ok, some suggestions.

    1. Tell them that you can spot a guilty person ::snap!:: just like that!

    2. In the same bag/container with your knitting needles, stick a small pistol, a crossbow and a blowgun. When they give you that WTF? look, just start singing…

    One of these things is not like the others,
    One of these things just doesn’t belong,
    Can you tell which thing is not like the others
    By the time I finish my song?

    You’ll be done with Jury Duty in no time!

    3. Wear a Jane hat during the Jury Selection process. Add a button that says something like:
    “The DA is an Alliance Flunky”

    “The difference between lawyers and Reavers? One’s an insane cannibalistic subculture that feeds on the weak and the others are Reavers.*”

    *Note – This attempt at humor refers only to those of the legal profession as they exist in the fictional universe created by the mind of Joss Whedon and is in no way a reflection on the fine upstanding members of the legal community in our world today. 🙂

  15. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    I’m thinking that I may take the light rail in, but if I take a spare set of bamboo DPNs, even if they got confiscated I’d be okay with it. As long as I got to keep my yarn.

  16. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    I’m thinking that I may take the light rail in, but if I take a spare set of bamboo DPNs, even if they got confiscated I’d be okay with it. As long as I got to keep my yarn.

  17. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    You have uncovered my secret shame. Unless I have instructions in front of me, I only know how to base chain.

  18. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    You have uncovered my secret shame. Unless I have instructions in front of me, I only know how to base chain.

  19. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    Yeah, but I’m kind of worried they won’t make that distinction. Unless I can find a knitter security guard.

  20. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    Yeah, but I’m kind of worried they won’t make that distinction. Unless I can find a knitter security guard.

  21. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    BWAH!

  22. tvini Avatar
    tvini

    BWAH!

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