And that’s that.
Thus endeth my run as GM Tvini in Dragonrealms. And sixteen years was a pretty good run. There are good feelings on all sides, so who knows? I may be back again someday, when I have more time.
I thought I was calm about this decision, but the night after it was done, I had nightmares about having submitted shoddy work in the game. (Note: I have NEVER done this. My work has always been excellent.) In the morning I woke up and realized that in some form or another, I had been a professional writer since I was 22 years old. As of today, I am not a professional writer. It’s led to a bit of an identity crisis. I consider myself an educated person of words and ideas. Objectively, however, that public identity has changed to “knitting hausfrau.” Yeah, I know, I’m still intelligent, and my job right now is being a dedicated mother and entrepreneur and my product is recognized worldwide as the best of its type, but right now it all feels like trying to comfort myself while continuing down a path that I didn’t ever see myself going down in the first place.
So please bear with me as I reorient myself and reexamine my priorities and my path. The only issue in Dragonrealms really was time. I found GMing to be a rewarding experience, working in an exciting environment with intelligent people. And the game has always been fun. So if the only issue was time, then perhaps this is a good moment to examine exactly what “time” means to me in my life, and whether I’m spending it in a way that is fulfilling.
I just wish it weren’t summer, so I had more time to think about time.